hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
