is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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