O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast