he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize