Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
