Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
