Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
