I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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