Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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