Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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