Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
