I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
