do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Randomize
