it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
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