Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
