you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I am never drinking with the goths again.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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