I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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