I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
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My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
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"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Drunk is a universal language darling
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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