i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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