I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
