What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
