Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
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do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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