it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
