Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
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Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
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