you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
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