Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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