he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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