So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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