He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
