So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
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I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.