i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
