i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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