She announced her abortion via fbk
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I have surprise drugs for everyone
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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