office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
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