Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
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