I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
