sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
