i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Someone shattered a urinal.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
