my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
