dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
