just come out here and I will go home with you...
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
