Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Randomize
