well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
