I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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