this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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