i jhust puked up my retainher.
What a fucking waste of an outfit
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
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this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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