Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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