Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
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Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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