i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
You left your phone here
Wait...
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