i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize
